She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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