so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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