My friends, they love my intelligence
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Randomize