And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
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