Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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