I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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