I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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