Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize