come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Randomize
