he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
