Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
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Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
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You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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