this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
