so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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