I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
