That's intense
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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