Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
