How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor