you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Be still, my beating vagina.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
