Define "chronic" masturbator.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
