He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i love accidental penises.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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