goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
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