soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
