Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
