Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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