I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
