Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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