Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
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