from now on my penis is your penis
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
