Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
