Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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