And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize