Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
