I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
