sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
