I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
