either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
