At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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