Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
