no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
