I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Randomize
