So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.