Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
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