Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
