I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
