ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
