i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
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