this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
