I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
