I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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