I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
