How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
