a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize